Monday, April 18, 2011

Voices, Narcissism and the Church

     One of my favorite classes in seminary was Black Church Studies.  As a seminary student, I was pretty much unafraid of being stretched and challenged.   I relished the opportunity to dive head first into traditions and points of view that differed from my own.  And I loved that class.  I loved reading about African Religion and Philosophy.  I was challenged by the study of the history of African-Americans in this country, especially in the part of the world where I grew up.  My horizons were being expanded on a daily basis and this, I feel, is one of the most important aspects of a seminary education.
     I must make a point here about my upbringing.  I have never heard my parents utter one word that could be construed as racist or prejudiced.  Granted, each person has their own prejudices so my parents are certainly not exempt.  But they were very intentional about how they treated people and how they spoke around my sister and I.  We were taught from an early age to show respect and that God loved ALL people.  While this might seem too optimistic and something of a "let's all hold hands and defeat racism" mentality, this was a vitally important and Christ-like thing to teach a 5-year-old kid.  My parents teaching me that all people are worthy of respect and bear God's image set a trajectory for me that allowed me to be challenged and inspired by my experience in seminary (and beyond).  What I heard outside of my home was a different story, both at school and, sadly, from some in my home church.  That's perhaps another conversation to be had in the future.
     One struggle that I had in those classes was where my voice fit in.  What could I say?  What could I contribute?  Did I have a voice?  My professor urged me on several occasions to speak up more, but I often felt that I could contribute nothing constructive to the conversation in that class.  I thought long and hard about my voice - what do I have to share?  Of course, as a preacher, my voice is front and center on a regular basis.  We preachers often pray that God would speak in our voices, but many times we speak in our own, personal, limited voice - reflected our limited understanding, our narrow world view, our own particular biases.  We are human, after all, and while we seek to be vessels, conduits for the voice of the Lord, many times it is our own puny voices that we are projecting. 
    There are times when silence is a blessing.  When saying nothing is far more appropriate than saying anything at all.  Our society, of course, does not adhere to this in the least.  We have turned into a society of narcissists, a society where we are taught that we must share our opinions, we must let people know what we are thinking, we have to stake out a position, we have to let people know what we are doing all the time (hence Twitter and Facebook - alas, I am the chief of sinners in this regard).  I understand the irony of my having a blog and writing that we're too enamored of our own voices.  I pray that God would help me to not be a narcissist.  I need help in this endeavor.  Thankfully, God gives help.
    The culture in the US is in dire need of an antidote for our rampant narcissism.  The Church offers a cure.  The Church, as it is intended, might actually be the cure for this.  We do indeed have a voice, something to say.  It is the message that has been handed down to us: "The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God has come near; repent, and believe in the good news."  (Mark 1:15)  The teachings of Scripture call us beyond ourselves and call us to join our voices to those who are already proclaiming reconciliation and redemption.  I learned in seminary that I do indeed have a voice and I am called to speak - the Church calls that out of me and all others.  What we learn is that our voice, while important, is not the only voice, indeed not the most important voice.  We learn to join our voices together - sometimes in beautiful harmony and other times in chaotic cacophony.  We might learn that there are many of our brothers and sisters who have been silenced and need to have their voices heard.  The Spirit at work in the Church can make room for the silenced voices to be heard.
     Just as important, the Church might teach us about the value of holy silence - which is the greatest antidote to our blathering narcissism that I can think of.  There are times when our voices must be stilled, when we must listen to the Spirit and to one another.  And when we speak, when our voice is called forth, we speak not of ourselves but of what God has done, is doing, and will do for the sake of the redemption and reconciliation of a broken, fallen world.  May God grant us the words to speak when our voice needs to be heard and the wisdom to keep silent when our voices need to be stilled.

Grace and Peace to all of you in the Name of Jesus.